Three Rules for a Better Day
March 2012: Filed in: ACT
Seems to me life is not a happy journey for some folks. Also seems to me that most of us accept this as being entirely out of our reach. So I thought today might be a good day to share some ideas I have about this. So here are my 3 simple rules for a better day. And who knows - maybe even a richer, fuller, more meaningful life. So, here goes.
Watch your mouth. I bet you’ve heard this one before. But I’m going to put a slightly different spin on it. Words are far more powerful than we give them credit. In fact words are so powerful they drive our thoughts and feelings. There is no doubt about this. The research is conclusive.
Listen carefully to the type of language you use when things are going well for you. Now listen to the language when things are not going. For example, for many life is a struggle; everything is too hard, I’m dumb, I cant do anything right, people are horrible, and so on.
On the other hand life could be a challenge, if it’s hard then the end result is more satisfying, I make stuff ups, but I learn from them, people are not horrible, they’re just need a nice word from someone.
Be careful what you think - someone is listening. Yes indeed. The Mind is a very good listener, and an even better doer. It will turn your thoughts into reality, quicker than you can blink. So be careful ... be very careful! So if, you spend most of your waking hours telling yourself you’re helpless, hopeless, useless, then what’s your Mind to do. After all it’s just trying to please you.
On the other hand, if you continually feed the Mind positive stories, ideas and information then it will do what it does best ... seek out evidence of this in your life. However, there is one catch, and you need to keep an eye out for it. I call it the Positive Thinking Paradox. For example, I’m trim, taught and terrific. If you know me you would respond as my Mind does, in your dreams maybe, but let’s face it, you’ve got a way to go.
The Mind knows bulldust when it hears and sees it. On the other hand if I were to say, I’d like to be trim, taught and terrific - and this is how I’m going to achieve that; then the Mind will pay attention.
Focus on the little things. It’s perfectly normal for all of us to look at what we have to do (today, next week, next month) and become overwhelmed by the enormity of what lays ahead. It’s hard wired in us, I think.
The normal response to this is to retreat into the safety of procrastination. We know it’s not going to go away, but still we do it. In the worst case scenario this becomes our Not Good Enough story. We then feel helpless and hopeless, so we resolve (unconsciously of course) to live mediocre lives. If you don’t get where I’m coming from, just recall the last time you found yourself thinking or saying, I don’t know where to start.
OK! So what can you do? Reframe. The next time you catch yourself saying or thinking something negative about your abilities - reframe it. For example, I can’t do that becomes, I will give it a go.
When you find yourself being spooked by the enormity of the task ahead ask yourself this question, what is one small, achievable action I can take in the next 24 hours that will move in the right direction; and act on it. When you have done it, set slightly bigger and bigger actions to take - and keep acting them. However, remember this; you are human and you will fall over from time to time.
So, if you did not act on a task you set yourself, be compassionate towards yourself and resolve to stand up and do it again. We all have our good and bad days. If it helps, if you fall over 8 times, get up nine.
Thank for listening
Greg
Listen carefully to the type of language you use when things are going well for you. Now listen to the language when things are not going. For example, for many life is a struggle; everything is too hard, I’m dumb, I cant do anything right, people are horrible, and so on.
On the other hand life could be a challenge, if it’s hard then the end result is more satisfying, I make stuff ups, but I learn from them, people are not horrible, they’re just need a nice word from someone.
Be careful what you think - someone is listening. Yes indeed. The Mind is a very good listener, and an even better doer. It will turn your thoughts into reality, quicker than you can blink. So be careful ... be very careful! So if, you spend most of your waking hours telling yourself you’re helpless, hopeless, useless, then what’s your Mind to do. After all it’s just trying to please you.
On the other hand, if you continually feed the Mind positive stories, ideas and information then it will do what it does best ... seek out evidence of this in your life. However, there is one catch, and you need to keep an eye out for it. I call it the Positive Thinking Paradox. For example, I’m trim, taught and terrific. If you know me you would respond as my Mind does, in your dreams maybe, but let’s face it, you’ve got a way to go.
The Mind knows bulldust when it hears and sees it. On the other hand if I were to say, I’d like to be trim, taught and terrific - and this is how I’m going to achieve that; then the Mind will pay attention.
Focus on the little things. It’s perfectly normal for all of us to look at what we have to do (today, next week, next month) and become overwhelmed by the enormity of what lays ahead. It’s hard wired in us, I think.
The normal response to this is to retreat into the safety of procrastination. We know it’s not going to go away, but still we do it. In the worst case scenario this becomes our Not Good Enough story. We then feel helpless and hopeless, so we resolve (unconsciously of course) to live mediocre lives. If you don’t get where I’m coming from, just recall the last time you found yourself thinking or saying, I don’t know where to start.
OK! So what can you do? Reframe. The next time you catch yourself saying or thinking something negative about your abilities - reframe it. For example, I can’t do that becomes, I will give it a go.
When you find yourself being spooked by the enormity of the task ahead ask yourself this question, what is one small, achievable action I can take in the next 24 hours that will move in the right direction; and act on it. When you have done it, set slightly bigger and bigger actions to take - and keep acting them. However, remember this; you are human and you will fall over from time to time.
So, if you did not act on a task you set yourself, be compassionate towards yourself and resolve to stand up and do it again. We all have our good and bad days. If it helps, if you fall over 8 times, get up nine.
Thank for listening
Greg